R U OK? A conversation could change a life

You don’t have to be an expert to support someone going through a tough time. You just need to be able to listen to their concerns without judgment and take the time to follow up with them.

R U OK? A conversation could change a life

You don’t have to be an expert to support someone going through a tough time. You just need to be able to listen to their concerns without judgment and take the time to follow up with them.

Below are some simple steps to start a conversation. You can also download our powerpoint presentation or check out our video role play. You can also watch videos with leading experts or call any number of crisis lines for immediate support.

1. Ask R U OK?

Start a general conversation; preferably somewhere private
Break the ice with a joke
Build trust through good eye contact, open and relaxed body language
Ask open–ended questions

‘What’s been happening? How are you going?’

‘I’ve noticed that... What’s going on for you at the moment?’

‘You don’t seem like yourself and I’m wondering are you ok? Is there anything that’s contributing?’

2. Listen without judgement

Guide the conversation with caring questions and give them time to reply
Don’t rush to solve problems for them
Help them understand that solutions are available when they’re ready to start exploring these

‘How has that made you feel?’

‘How long have you felt this way?’

‘What do you think caused this reaction?’

3. Encourage action

Summarise the issues and ask them what they plan to do
Encourage them to take one step, such as see their doctor
If they’re unsure about where to go to for help, help them to contact a local doctor or the Employee Assistance Program (EAP)

‘What do you think might help your situation?’

‘Have you considered making an appointment with your doctor?’

‘Would you like me to make an appointment or come with you?’

4. Follow up

Put a note in your diary to call them in one week. If they’re desperate, follow up sooner
Ask if they’ve managed to take that first step and see someone
If they didn’t find this experience helpful, urge them to try a different professional because there’s someone out there who can help them

‘How are things going? Did you speak with your doctor?’

‘What did they suggest? What did you think of their advice?’

‘You’ve had a busy time. Would you like me to make the appointment?’

If you are concerned about yourself, someone else, or just need to talk with someone, please phone the University Counselling Service

Callaghan - (02) 4921 5801

Central Coast - (02) 4348 4060

Or call...